You’re Right. You Should Give Up On Love.

Oh sweet things.

How my heart breaks when I see you’ve given up on love.  When I read your posts and tweets that you are done with love and feelings that only lead to heartbreak. When I hear your downright disgust for what in reality is the most beautiful thing allowed to be experienced here on earth. 

I want to tell you how {wonderful} love is.  How {magical} and {supernatural} it feels to be loved and to give love.  To be in a relationship with someone where love abounds with respect and adoration and being cherished oh-so-tenderly. I want to encourage you to hold out for love because it is worth the wait. Love is worth being vulnerable for. 

But then I realize the problem. And I stop myself. Because you know what?

You’re right. You should give up on love.

You should give up on an idea of love that requires you to lower any sort of standard or expectation of commitment. 

You should give up on an idea of love that says in order to truly express your love you must give that person every waking moment hour of your day. 

You should give up on an idea of love that forces you to accept the ludicrous impression that you must be crazy if you expect purity both physically and mentally from your partner. 

You should give up on an idea of love that is completely physical. 

You should give up on an idea of love that sets out to destroy the other relationships in your life.

You should give up on an idea of love that instead of affirming who you are as a person, leads you to question everything about yourself. 

You should give up on an idea of love that promotes dishonesty and disloyalty.

You should give up on an idea of love that gives up easily.

You should give up on an idea of love that is missing the very essence of its definition.

You see, for me to encourage you to hold on to an idea of love that differs so greatly from the very intention and creation of love would be wrong. 

If I were to tell you to continue fighting for this concept of love that envelops such aspects of selfishness, pride, promiscuity, lies, and flaunts itself as if it were a trophy would be the worst possible decision I could make. 

Because that my dearies, that is not love. 

A love that says you can hide things from your partner because “what they don’t know won’t hurt them” is a love waiting to die.

In all honesty, a love that says you can watch pornography and still be committed to your partner is a flat out lie.

A love that pushes limits of convictions and morality is absolutely of no value to you.

A love that is rude and arrogant and lacking in sacrifice isn’t the love that I would wish upon anyone.

My heart’s desire is to expose the falsehood of this idea of love and reveal the beauty of true love.  That idea of love was created from a society of self-seeking individuals who desire the perks of love without any commitment or accountability on their part. 

But you see, the fact remains that TRUE LOVE is…well… lovely.

The love that I am an advocate for is pure.

The love that I want to promote is authentic.

It screams of ENDURANCE.
It is passionately PROTECTING of the other.
It is more HONORABLE than Mr. Prince Charming himself.
It radiates PATIENCE in the most trying of times. 
It is more SENSITIVE than a cotton handkerchief.
It envelops HOPE when there is nothing left.
It does not keep score but instead rallies together at its weakest point. 
It is the farthest thing from anger.

This love.

This love wasn’t meant to fail. 

My dear friends, love doesn’t fail because of Who created love. Because of Who love IS.  Love that does not include the Maker of love will never fully satisfy that intimate acquaintance of what love is, what love can do, and what love can be in your life.  It’s that simple.  

The Bible says that “Whoever does not love does not know God, because GOD IS LOVE.” (1 John 4:8)

Love will always fail you and consistently fall short if it is missing the very part that defines it. 

Some say, “you’re looking for love in all the wrong places.”
I say, “you’re looking for love that doesn’t exist.”

A love relationship CAN NOT exist completely without Christ. 

Now huddle in close. You ready? This is VERY important. It most certainly cannot exist without your partner believing this same concept of love. Nope. End of discussion.

Precious ones, don’t give up on Love. I beg you. That is the LAST thing the Lord wants to hear his sweet creation say about what He created to be so tender and magnificent. But more importantly don’t confuse yourselves with what the world and celebrities tweet and hashtag about their idea of love. Don’t misinterpret the reality and depth God wants to offer through love because of society’s views of love displayed through Pinterest quotes and secular lyrics thrown across raunchy Instagram photos. Because it is SO MUCH MORE THAN THAT! Seek what the Bible says about love and run after that kind of love!!

Love is the complete nature of God.
And that, my lovelies, is an adventure too great to pass up.  

{ And while we are on the subject of “love is worth waiting/fighting for”, take into account that if we just resolved LOVE to be SO much more than what the world desires to offer us, a love of this magnitude will need some time in the making. Don’t rush something so grand and so amazing if it’s not ready. Chances are you are missing out on a huge adventure in itself in the meantime. Don’t worry, that blog is coming soon ;) }

Disclaimer: A relationship between two humans will never be perfect. Including my own. Even if it is founded on the love I desperately want to pursue and urge you to fight for.  Where there is human nature, there will be flaws, there will be disagreements, there will be failure.  But there will also be forgiveness and hope and trust and the power of Christ to withstand the trials and temptations this life will most assuredly throw at you. 

[The author’s personal conviction based on scripture is that a man and woman were created for romantic relationships. When the term “partner” is referenced, it implies the opposite sex of the reader whichever you may be. Additional convictions include that any act of sexual intimacy is reserved for marriage alone. ]